Best Tips for Long-distance Caregiving
About 22 percent of caregivers in Canada live more than an hour away by car from their loved ones. Although just as fulfilling as caring for someone who lives nearby, long-distance caregiving can be much more challenging. In fact, research shows that it typically increases the risk of some caregiving consequences, such as financial hardship.
Being proactive as a caregiver significantly boosts the odds that you will be more effective in your role. It also reduces your risk of caregiver stress and burnout. Use these five best tips for long-distance caregiving to achieve all of those outcomes and more.
Find Out What Your Loved One Needs
When you do not live close to your care recipient, you cannot be as responsive to their needs. You are not on the scene frequently to quickly notice any changes in their health status including medical needs and adherence to medication schedules.
You can have the biggest impact on their care and your overall relationship by asking them directly how you can best help them from a distance. For instance, they know you won’t be able to help them with tasks such as getting to medical appointments or cooking for them.
But you can alleviate loneliness for them, with more frequent communication by all methods — telephone, email, FaceTime, Skype, letters, and the occasional in-person visit.
Do not underestimate how important staying in touch is for them. Remember that social isolation among seniors increases the risk of loneliness, depression and premature death.
Also, you don’t need to live nearby to help them with online research to find information about a chronic condition they might have, or to find the best nursing home or hospice. Find out what their most pressing needs are that you can help with from a distance.
Create a Care Team or Network
This is a standard recommendation for all caregivers who want to achieve the best possible outcomes for their loved ones. However, it takes on even greater importance when you are caregiving from a distance.
A caregiver team or network can include other family members, friends, medical and care professionals, live-in carers, food delivery service, church members, volunteers, and local organizations.
They can be your eyes and ears where your loved one’s needs are concerned. Every person in your caregiving network should have all your contact details, including home, work and mobile numbers, and email and home address.
Let them know they can contact you at any time to discuss your loved one’s needs. But also schedule regular check-ins with them.
Use Technology
Caregiving apps have become essential tools for ensuring quality care for our loved ones. They also go a long way to simplifying certain tasks for caregivers. However, they are not the only technology that can make caregiving easier.
Technology that helps to monitor elderly people can be controversial. So, it’s best to have a frank conversation with your loved one about it. Listen to their concerns and respect it before going ahead with a technology solution.
Some of these tech tools include fall detection systems such as Lifeline, Life Assure and Telus’ Living Well Companion. Research location devices that help find elderly people if they wander off. Also, if your car or your loved one’s car doesn’t have GPS, consider installing it.
Medication reminder apps are also valuable, especially if you notice your loved one experiencing frequent memory lapses. Also, if your family member has mobility problems, start researching assistive devices that can make their daily lives easier and help them maintain their independence.
Care2Talk is a video technology platform that connects seniors or people with dementia/cognitive disabilities with their care providers, family, or friends. Video calling applications proved to be too confusing for many older adults to navigate and use. Care2talk resulted from this need to keep the aging population socially connected.
Attend Telehealth Appointments
Sometimes the person you are caring for has difficulty understanding medical jargon or is worried about deciding how to manage a health problem. It can be beneficial to have their caregiver relative attend appointments with them.
Fortunately, with today’s technology, you do not have to attend in person. Increasingly, telehealth is becoming the norm, with a wide range of health professionals offering this option.
If your loved one is not comfortable attending telehealth appointments, you might have to attend the first one with them from their home. Make sure they have the necessary equipment (older computers might not support telehealth software), including a web camera and microphone.
You should also speak with each other to find out what issues need to be discussed and make a list so you don’t forget an important point. For instance, there might be problems with medication side effects, a new drug or treatment your loved one wants to try, or potential complications of an upcoming surgery.
Ask your healthcare professional if you can record the appointment. Studies show that about half of all patients leave a doctor’s office unclear about what they have been told and what they are to do.
Keep in mind that some health professionals might not be comfortable with this. However, in Canada, it is not illegal to record a healthcare visit. Just be sure to be upfront about it and use the recording ethically, in other words, no sharing it with others including on social media.
Speak to Your Employer or Supervisor
Long-distance caregivers are just as much at risk for workplace challenges as caregivers who live near to their loved ones. For instance, they are more likely to miss full days of work, and this complication plays out along gender lines.
In a General Social Survey study, researchers found that 46 percent of caregivers who were women and lived more than an hour away missed more full days of work compared to just 27 percent of caregivers who are men. Furthermore, as your loved one’s care needs increase, you are likely to miss even more days at work.
Even if you do not take a lot of time off, long-distance caregiving can negatively impact your job in other ways. It might make you less focused, increase work-related mistakes and reduce your productivity. Before you let any of these consequences railroad your career, it’s best to be proactive and speak to your manager.
More companies are becoming aware of the caregiving demands being placed on Canadians. They are offering flexible work arrangements, including working from home and reduced hours.
Being upfront with your company or organization can help to reduce stress, guilt, or worry you might have about not succeeding at work or as a caregiver.
Ask your healthcare professional if you can record the appointment. Studies show that about half of all patients leave a doctor’s office unclear about what they have been told and what they are to do.
Keep in mind that some health professionals might not be comfortable with this. However, in Canada, it is not illegal to record a healthcare visit. Just be sure to be upfront about it and use the recording ethically, in other words, no sharing it with others including on social media.
Pay Attention to Your Finances
Because you live far away from your loved one and you aren’t coping with their day-to-day needs, you might underestimate the impact your role is having on your financial wellbeing.
According to Statistics Canada, 62 percent of caregivers who lived half a day’s journey away from their parent being cared for accrued extra expenses as a result of their role. However, that was the case for only 30 percent of carers who lived in the same neighbourhood as their parent.
Costs can be as low as $7,500 a year or as much as $120,000. Factors such as missing work, having to quit your job and additional expenses related to caregiving can add to the financial burden. Be sure to create a money management plan from the beginning.
Schedule Visits Outside of Rush Hour
Caregiving is stressful enough, especially if you are juggling it with a job. The last thing you need is the mania and anxiety of rush hour traffic.
As much as possible, arrange trips to see your loved one outside of high-traffic hours in your area. Weekends are perfect opportunities, and you can even extend the stay by starting your visit on Friday evenings.
During the week, consider visiting after 6 pm and sleeping over occasionally, if it’s possible. You can leave the next day before 6 to beat the early morning traffic.
Rethink Location
If long-distance caregiving is taking too much of a toll, it’s time to consider a move. In some cases, it might be easier for you to move closer to your care receiver.
For instance, your loved one might already have a solid medical and care team and a wider social network in place. Or they might live in an area with better hospitals or health professionals who specialize in a chronic condition they have.
Also, areas that are walkable and with a wide range of senior events and organizations can help your loved one to maintain their independence and quality of life.
In those cases, it’s better they stay put and you relocate closer to where they are.
No Better Time for Long-distance Caregiving
With our modern flexible lifestyles, innovative technology and growing awareness of caregivers’ responsibilities, being a long-distance caregiver has become much more doable than ever before.
Take advantage of these tips to lessen your caregiving burden and be more effective in meeting your loved one’s needs.
