12 Secrets of the Most Effective Caregivers
Whether you are new to caregiving or you have been doing it for a while, you might be wondering if there are any secrets to being an effective caregiver. After all, it’s not a role you take lightly, and you want to avoid common pitfalls.
Caregiving can throw you into the deep end. More often than not, caregivers are completely unprepared for their weighty role.
But as American Christian author Steve Brown says, ”Remember that anything worth doing is worth doing poorly — until you learn to do it well.”
It’s true. Sometimes you just have to wing it, or as others say, “fake it till you make it.”
However, if you can shorten the learning curve when it comes to caring for your loved one, all the better. Both of you can avoid the fallout of poor caregiving. In some cases, those consequences can be severe, including elder abuse, depression, and caregiver burnout.
Try these secrets of the most effective caregivers to get a head start in one of the most important and vital journeys of your life.
- Accept your situation. Being in denial makes you less likely to have a positive outlook on your role. It also makes you less proactive as a caregiver which is essential for getting the help and skills you need.
- Make self-care a priority from the beginning. You will be physically, emotionally and mentally more effective at helping your loved one with their health and care needs. You will also be less likely to suffer caregiver burnout. Self-care can be as simple as practising deep-breathing or walking daily, or eating more nutritious meals.
- Learn to delegate. At all costs, don’t be the type of caregiver who thinks they need to do everything by themselves. Ask for help. Delegate tasks to family members. Hire professionals when necessary.
- Set boundaries. Concern for your loved one’s wellbeing, fear, anxiety and even guilt can make you oblivious to your own needs and limits. Some care recipients can be very demanding. Establish boundaries early on to help them manage their expectations as well as your own.
- Put your ego aside. When an adult loved one is dependent on us, it can be tempting to want to take over. Don’t assume you have all the answers and solutions. After all, no one does. Let your loved one contribute as much as possible and respect their wishes. If you believe their wants are harming them, consult with a healthcare or care professional.
- Listen attentively. Learning to manage your ego and expectations as a caregiver will make it easier for you to really listen to your loved one and be more in tune with their needs. When your loved one senses that you are actively listening, they are also more likely to be open about their needs and to give essential feedback.
Good listening skills are also critical when it comes to communicating with your caregiving team or network. For instance, it helps you to better understand medical conditions and medical procedures, or to learn how to manage medications and carry out certain caregiving tasks.
- Seek support from the beginning. As a caregiver, you will face frequent demands and challenges. It can be overwhelming. Research consistently shows that support can minimize caregiving stress, and improve a caregiver’s sense of competence, effectiveness and quality of life.
Caregiver support also has a positive impact on the care recipient’s quality of life, which is a key desired outcome of caregiving.
- Be adaptable. Caregiving is seldom routine. Your loved one’s needs can change daily, or even within a given day. Crises occur without warning and you will have to manage them while taking care of your own responsibilities and needs.
Being flexible and adaptable goes a long way to minimizing the stress of unpredictability and ever-changing demands. Try not to get locked into expectations or to rely too heavily on routines.
- Be collaborative. When you take this approach, you help your loved one to preserve their independence. However, you also lighten your load and the expectations you put on yourself. In turn, this helps to reduce doubt, worry and guilt you might experience as a caregiver.
Being collaborative can also improve your interactions with your healthcare and care team, which directly improves the care your loved one receives.
- Be a knowledge seeker. Commit to learning as much as you can about caregiving and about the health conditions your loved one has. Also, find out as much as possible about local, national and online services that can benefit both you and your family member.
As you become more proactive about gathering information, you will find you are able to deal with unexpected problems or challenges, not just the ones you are already facing.
- Use caregiving apps. Today, you have dozens of apps, such as CarePal, and other software at your disposal to streamline and simplify your caregiver role.
For instance, they can help you to manage medication schedules, book appointments, collaborate with your care team, or provide a central location to store important documents, such as living wills. You can also download self-care apps for your own well-being and health.
- Remember who your loved one is. Don’t view them as just a patient with a bunch of health or medical problems. No one wants to be seen as a nuisance or to be treated with a sense of condescension or pity.
Treat your loved one as a whole person and honour who they have been to you. Feeling loved and respected helps to maintain physical, mental and emotional health.
You will also find you have a healthier relationship and that your role as a caregiver is more rewarding.
Embrace These Secrets of the Most Effective Caregivers
Even if you cannot adopt all of these strategies right away, start with one or two that you think will make the biggest impact the quickest. Some of them, such as No. 5 and No. 10, require a mere mindset shift that can completely change your approach to caregiving overnight.
Let us know which ones you plan to use or are already using as a caregiver.
SOURCES
Goals Planning and Action Guide: How to Get the Most Out of Your Life, by Zig Ziglar
RLAE: Effectiveness of a support intervention for family caregivers and stroke survivors* https://www.scielo.br/j/rlae/a/pQyvYxkRSjWfyy8QDn9bTBD/?format=pdf&lang=en
